Umami Dominates COR Fantasy Football League

The Conquer, Oppress, and Raze (COR) Fantasy Football League inaugural season ended with Umami leading Don Meinel's Teeth to a convincing 136-77 victory over a game, but ultimately outgunned Miller Lite team.  Lite QB Tim Tebow could not deliver one final miracle and The Teeth rode balanced scoring (32, 21, 20, 20, 14, 11, 9, 9) to the title.  The Teeth (as they are affectionately called) finished 12-4, averaged an absurd 125 points per game, and look poised to gloat for a solid year.

Umami Wields the Hammer of COR

The Teeth took an unusual route to the top, surrounding team MVP Calvin Johnson with late round draft picks (Darren Sproles (13th round)), emerging talent (Rob Gronkowski (7th round)), late season bloomers (Percy Harvin (8th round)), castoffs (C.J. Spiller, dropped by Big Island Sausage), a shrewd trade (Matt Stafford for Rex Grossman and A.J. Green), augmented by canny waiver wire picks (John Kasay, 49ers Defense).

A good thing, too, since The Teeth faced their share of injuries (Andre Johnson, Jahvid Best), though at least they weren't injured when drafted (*cough* Peyton Manning *cough*).

They suffered through the frustrating inconsistency that is Ryan Mathews.

They endured the embarrassment for having their draft picks perform well for other teams (Willis McGahee, Reggie Bush), though not as bad as Big Island Sausage, who dropped Spiller just in time for Fred Jackson to suffer his season-ending injury.

Umami, asked for the secrets to his success, summed it up by saying:  "Talent, skill, luck, clean living, and a lack of Brett Favre will take you a long way.   And you can take that to the bank!"

See you next season!